Union Jacks Club

I don't know which establishment the reviewer was thinking of, but Union Jack's lacks both windows and waiters.

Posted 01/04/09

Posted by Fred Hansen CEO of Trimet - Sitting down, ready to eat, when a waiter brings out a tray of about 30 water glasses and sets the tray down on a table next to time.
Sun shining through window and through glasses

Mixed in with the water and copious amounts of chipped ice I can see parts of crawlers floating in the bottoms of several glasses - partial thoraxes, legs, etc.

Decide then to no longer frequent this bar.

Caveat: I'm certain, without the benefit of bright light shining directly through the glass, no one would ever detect the presence of the crawler parts.

Gulp, gulp, ummmmmmm.

Pros: Beautiful girls

Cons: Crawlers in my drinks and needs more lighting

Posted 12/10/08

"Sucide Girls" and boa constrictors combined with a 60's swing club ambiance help make this a fun evening out with the guys or the girls - you're just as likely to see couples at the table as you are horny frat boys. This place restored my faith in the strip club scene a few years back and I've been showing up ever since.

Pros: Hot Chicks, Good Beer, Boa Constrictors

Cons: Too Many Urban Hipsters, Slow Service at the Bar

Posted 05/10/08

( . )( . ) DANI is DANGEROUS (_)_) $ MAKE IT RAIN $

$ Belladonna - Valentine - Stella - Foster ---->> WILL BREAK YOUR NECK $

CIRCUMSTANCES I am 25 yr old male from Seattle- Went to "Union Jacks'" in Portland on the 9th of November 2008 Got in Friday night 8pm from Seattle -

Was my first time to Portland - bachelor party - myself, 6 other guys looking for entertainment TnA !!!

11am- wake up - Clean Up - Bank

1pm - Strip Club hopping

3:30- "ENTER UNION JACK'S " LESS THAN A 100YARDS FROM OUR PENTHOUSE SUITE AT THE JUPITER- an affordable spot good for partying. ( I say have a drink and preview - eat something elsewhere - walk to your hotel - Get really drunk or whatever your party favor is - and go back before 6pm)

BARTENDER - DANCERS - OFF THE HOOK
-----> Angela was our bartender - Nice as can be - and makes you think " wish she was dancing....fuck..." so you turn to the left with your drink and head to the main-stage - as you walk, on your left THREE BOOTHS WITH NO TABLES AND BLACK CURTAINS, on your right clean shiny hardwood bar with stools to sit. about 12-15 chairs surround the stage then booths and tables surround it. STRIPPER POLE REACHES UP TO THE CIELINGS 25FT HIGH.

BODIES ARE FLAWLESS - Different shapes and sizes and colors - dark or pale - little (.) (.) big( . )( . ) ( nothing to big ) - big (_)_) /small/ medium but all Apples -

GIRLS KICK IT- they don't harrass you for dances - they might ask but, I was not harrassed - regardless of who you liked the most ASK WHO GIVES GOOD DANCES, somegirls are new to stripping, you know?

Girl asks if you want a dance take it...or if you are not ready...give her a dollar just for askin, keeps $ in your pocket and a smile on her face - WOMEN LIKE THE SMELL OF MONEY doesn't mean you have to give all of it away -
IF YOUR GOIN TO THE CLUB BRING A HUNDRED ONES ATLEAST AND THROW TEN AT AT TIME (couple times) - boost the show

UJ- is the S#/T - GR Seattle

Pros: flawless bodies - nice girls - clean atmosphere

Cons: $5 cover at night - worth it

Posted 02/09/08

GREG IS THE CREATOR,DESIGNER AND OWNER OF THE UNION JACK CLUB! NICE WOMEN ALL SCANDANAVIAN TYPES BLONDES WITH STACKED RACKS AND HOT WET SMOOTH SLICES! GREG IS THE MAN! HE CREATED PARIS AND PUT HER DOWN! SHE IS NOT A EUROPEAN CITY OR COUNTRY SHE SHOULD BE TURNED INTO DOG FOOD! THIS PLACE HAS A GREAT ATOMSPHERE,FOOD AND GREAT DRINK SPECIALS! GREG IS ALWAYS THE MAN AND HE OWNS THE HILTON PROPERTIES AND ALWAYS HAS! THAT'S WHY THAT ALREADY HURT HER AND HER WEASEL BOYFRIEND!

Posted 11/04/07

We have not found any other club in Portland where my wife feels totally comfortable walking into. Saturday nights are the best for couples. It can get extremely crowded and the drinks are often hard to get, but we can often count as many women patrons as there are men. Find a table to sit at and there might be 5 other couples around you enjoying the show. The girls are all great. No Barbie types, just a great variety of hot portlandesque women. When we meet one of the girls we always leave feeling like we made a new friend. They are real, wild and a lot of fun. Some of our favorite dancers are pierced, inked, hot and they are extremely entertaining when they dance. Paris will have you feeling like she could really hurt you ...in a good way, princess might play a little peek-a-boo and then start dancing like she?s all by herself in her bedroom and a kicking song just came on, Angelica will pull a full handstand splits on the edge of the stage....they have every variety and we really enjoy almost every one of them. Only things I would complain about is the difficulty getting a drink, and I notice the girls don't approach the couples very often. That?s too bad because we love getting to know the girls, we give better tips to the ones who get to know us and once we even got a couples dance, (thanks Paris...my wife was completely out of control on the way home and the rest of the night!). Union Jacks is by far the best club in Portland, (unless you?re into Barbie). They should advertise that they are couple friendly because we had a hard time finding a club that we could go to together.

Pros: The hot Portland Girls, couple friendly atmosphere, complete atmosphere.

Cons: Hard to get drinks when it is crowded. No servers only the two bartenders.

Posted 04/05/07

Great place, any night. The women are Portland's idea of hot (tattooed, edgier, inimitable, etc). The music, interior, bar staff, patrons are cool. Except for last sunday when a girl punked me off just for commenting on why she was sitting alone (say good-bye to the $100 or so an outing I spend on babes for just being cool), nothing but positive vibes there. I've seen a lot of clubs by myself, with clients, with girlfriends: this one's the best!

Pros: the babes, happy hour promos

Cons: zero!

Posted 01/05/07

Seriously. The girls are amazing. Not your average barbie doll cookie cutter strippers. They have a serious variation of girls from the tattooed to the conservative. Some girls do regualr shows but when I went some were doing burlesque and themed sets. This is the cest strip club I have been to in Portland.

Pros: variety, cool lights, free parking

Cons: long wait at bar

Posted 01/01/06

THE NEW LOOK, FEEL, STAFF & DANCERS ARE TOP NOTCH. I WAS QUITE IMPRESSED WITH ALL THE NEW CHANGES. THE GIRLS WERE BEAUTIFUL, THE STAFF WAS COURTEOUS AND THE NEW PRICES WERE VERY REASONABLE.

Pros: GOOD PARKING, GOOD PRICES, GOOD STAFF

Cons: WOMENS BATHROOM NEEDS

Posted 11/09/02

Wow! What a difference a change in management has made for Jacks. New hotties and friendlier staff has really brought this club back to being one of my favs. Jacks has on of the coolest atmospheres and the new beer garden out back is an awesome sunny day hang out. Jacks is definately a unique and fun place to party.

Pros: Beer Garden, Cute Girls, Cool Atmosphere

Posted 06/21/02