Hoh Humm Ranch

★★☆☆☆

About Hoh Humm Ranch

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My mom and I love to stay at working farm B&B??s around Washington. We enjoy farming and animals and loved the website, which was simple but to-the-point. We don??t care about fancy, luxurious rooms or a private bathroom, and we were excited about all the animals mentioned, so we happily booked a room for three nights.

We arrived after dark on Monday night to a ramshackle, falling-apart farmhouse covered with defunct antennas and heaps of moss. The empty (except for a thick layer of grass at the bottom) broken-down swimming pool with a slide in the front yard was very creepy.

We met Mary at the door, while Bob ignored us watching TV (which never turned off during our four-day stay.) The main floor of the house was one huge room, cluttered with dirty, animal-hair-covered, falling-apart couches. The second floor has several ??guest rooms? (which used to be the kids?? bedrooms) and one bathroom, and a dark, cob-webby hall filled with display-cases of art pieces and knick-knacks. We were shown a tiny dark depressing room on this floor overlooking the road, but we asked for one with an animal-view. This we got on the third floor ?? a large, two-bed, cleanish (except for windows full of cobwebs) room with a panoramic view of the ranch, and a bathroom which was private for us only because no one else was staying there.

This view was amazing. We could spot twenty or so llamas, a large herd of cattle, sheep, Japanese ??seeka? deer, wild birds, a pond, the Hoh River with its large gravel bed, woods, and misty mountains. The view also included the falling-apart roof covered with moss and even clumps of grass.

The ??farm-fresh? breakfasts had pros and cons. The hash browns were frozen from Costco. I found a black hair in the Dutch-Baby casserole. After that, I didn??t trust any of the food, and stuck to cereal and bacon. My mom liked the cornbread and there was a lot of home-made food. The most amazing part was the clam fritters, with incredibly fresh razor-clams from a local Indian tribe. The smell of food pervades everywhere in the house all the time.

The hosts, Bob and Mary, had very interesting stories and histories. Listening to their extraordinary tales was definitely a highlight. They were not the most welcoming and friendly hosts at first, but we got to know them quite well.

One morning I went out with the farm helpers to feed the cows and llamas hay, to chuck the pigs some scraps, and to bottle-feed the kids and lambs (orphans.) This was a major highlight for me.

At first I was very nervous of the dogs ?? there were two large black dogs, a large white dog, and three huge Pyrenees. They are quite friendly, however. Dog hair is everywhere, but not in the rooms.

On our last night, a down-right disgusting stench reached our noses in the evening. It was the smell of dog poop. We tried opening the windows, the door, and turning off the heater, but the stench remained. We could barely sleep. The next morning, we noticed a pile of dog-diarrhea outside our door. YUCK! Mary cleaned it up? what a night.

The farm was full of junk and debris, including ten or so shacks and many rusted out cars. Wildlife, farm animals, and scenery were wonderful.

The rates were incredibly cheap, the breakfast so-so, the view amazing, the animals neat, the house a pit (cluttered and dirty), the farm a junk-yard, the hosts interesting but somewhat indifferent, and the location was convenient. I can??t believe anyone would return. I don??t recommend it.

1
★☆☆☆☆

My mom and I love to stay at working farm B&B??s around Washington. We enjoy farming and animals and loved the website, which was simple but to-the-point. We don??t care about fancy, luxurious rooms or a private bathroom, and we were excited about all the animals mentioned, so we happily booked a room for three nights.

We arrived after dark on Monday night to a ramshackle, falling-apart farmhouse covered with defunct antennas and heaps of moss. The empty (except for a thick layer of grass at the bottom) broken-down swimming pool with a slide in the front yard was very creepy.

We met Mary at the door, while Bob ignored us watching TV (which never turned off during our four-day stay.) The main floor of the house was one huge room, cluttered with dirty, animal-hair-covered, falling-apart couches. The second floor has several ??guest rooms? (which used to be the kids?? bedrooms) and one bathroom, and a dark, cob-webby hall filled with display-cases of art pieces and knick-knacks. We were shown a tiny dark depressing room on this floor overlooking the road, but we asked for one with an animal-view. This we got on the third floor ?? a large, two-bed, cleanish (except for windows full of cobwebs) room with a panoramic view of the ranch, and a bathroom which was private for us only because no one else was staying there.

This view was amazing. We could spot twenty or so llamas, a large herd of cattle, sheep, Japanese ??seeka? deer, wild birds, a pond, the Hoh River with its large gravel bed, woods, and misty mountains. The view also included the falling-apart roof covered with moss and even clumps of grass.

The ??farm-fresh? breakfasts had pros and cons. The hash browns were frozen from Costco. I found a black hair in the Dutch-Baby casserole. After that, I didn??t trust any of the food, and stuck to cereal and bacon. My mom liked the cornbread and there was a lot of home-made food. The most amazing part was the clam fritters, with incredibly fresh razor-clams from a local Indian tribe. The smell of food pervades everywhere in the house all the time.

The hosts, Bob and Mary, had very interesting stories and histories. Listening to their extraordinary tales was definitely a highlight. They were not the most welcoming and friendly hosts at first, but we got to know them quite well.

One morning I went out with the farm helpers to feed the cows and llamas hay, to chuck the pigs some scraps, and to bottle-feed the kids and lambs (orphans.) This was a major highlight for me.

At first I was very nervous of the dogs ?? there were two large black dogs, a large white dog, and three huge Pyrenees. They are quite friendly, however. Dog hair is everywhere, but not in the rooms.

On our last night, a down-right disgusting stench reached our noses in the evening. It was the smell of dog poop. We tried opening the windows, the door, and turning off the heater, but the stench remained. We could barely sleep. The next morning, we noticed a pile of dog-diarrhea outside our door. YUCK! Mary cleaned it up? what a night.

The farm was full of junk and debris, including ten or so shacks and many rusted out cars. Wildlife, farm animals, and scenery were wonderful.

The rates were incredibly cheap, the breakfast so-so, the view amazing, the animals neat, the house a pit (cluttered and dirty), the farm a junk-yard, the hosts interesting but somewhat indifferent, and the location was convenient. I can??t believe anyone would return. I don??t recommend it.

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We had a great time at the Hoh Humm ranch. Lodgings were only $35/night, and we were served the biggest breakfast I had ever seen. It was delicious! The owners are very friendly, and there are animals everywhere. There was even a baby goat hanging out with us during breakfast. It was quite the experience.

4
★★★★☆

We had a great time at the Hoh Humm ranch. Lodgings were only $35/night, and we were served the biggest breakfast I had ever seen. It was delicious! The owners are very friendly, and there are animals everywhere. There was even a baby goat hanging out with us during breakfast. It was quite the experience.

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